The Guardian · US news · Original story
‘Loneliness influencers’ are racking up views. After a breakup, I see the appeal | Dave Schilling
Following a failed relationship in my 40s, solitude is tempting. But I’m not giving up on finding love, warts and all
My birthday is coming up next month. I will be, by my count, even more ancient than I was last year. I’ll be far enough from 40 to make it irrational to lie and say I’m actually in my late 30s. I’m solidly, unequivocally in middle age.
And when you’re in middle age, you do a lot of looking back, soul-searching and other highly unproductive activities. I’ve been doing that even more thanks to being dumped by my girlfriend a month before my birthday. Yes, I am a 41-year-old man who uses the term “girlfriend”, a word that infantilizes me just typing it. What am I, a teenager sobbing to a Smiths song? In spirit, yes. I am.
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Dave Schilling · Sat, Jun 13, 2026, 4:00 AM
US news | The Guardian
Following a failed relationship in my 40s, solitude is tempting. But I’m not giving up on finding love, warts and all
My birthday is coming up next month. I will be, by my count, even more ancient than I was last year. I’ll be far enough from 40 to make it irrational to lie and say I’m actually in my late 30s. I’m solidly, unequivocally in middle age.
And when you’re in middle age, you do a lot of looking back, soul-searching and other highly unproductive activities. I’ve been doing that even more thanks to being dumped by my girlfriend a month before my birthday. Yes, I am a 41-year-old man who uses the term “girlfriend”, a word that infantilizes me just typing it. What am I, a teenager sobbing to a Smiths song? In spirit, yes. I am.
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